......We would have standardized play date rules. These rules come from things I've experienced over the last 11.5 years (no I'm not kidding!).
Here's what I propose:
1. Plan the play date at least two days ahead of time (preferably longer). Some of us aren't as flexible as others (especially those of us who single parent part of the time!).
**2. If you invite, then you pick up and bring the child home (especially if you live over 30 mins. from said invited child's house!).
***3. If you invite for an activity you pay (i.e. swimming, bowling, Amazing Pizza machine, etc.).
4. Don't invite my kid over and then at the end of the play date call and ask, "Can she/he stay overnight?" Again, overnight stays are another thing that I like to have planned out.
5. Remember that the rules are a lot different for a first-born child than they may be for your 3rd or 4th born child. My first-born is the kid I'm learning through. Don't expect me to allow a lot of the things that you have already experienced. And YES, I expect there to be supervision with 11 year olds when they are out in a public place.
6. If your kid is calling to invite my kid over, I would still like to speak to a parent/adult to confirm everything. I'm sorry but have you ever heard the way 11 year olds translate things or answer questions.
7. If you are inviting my child out on a boat and she's never been on one before, I will be a little wary. Please understand!
8. If there aren't going to be any parents home then my kids will not be able to come to play date.
9. If you invite my kid over and I have to come pick them up at your house then please have them ready at the agreed upon departure time.
10. And finally, if you call me and say, "Come get your kid. My kid is misbehaving and their punishment is the end of the play date." I will say no, especially if my other child is having a play date here.
**I am willing to be flexible on this rule as it relates to birthday parties. I understand that this is a different situation!
***Another area can be flexible with. I actually don't care as much about this one. If someone is willing to take my kid AND bring them home, I will gladly pay.
That's what I propose (and also the rules we follow here!).
Did I forget anything moms?